It’s healthy as a lawyer to want to provide solace to those who seek your help in their most desperate moments. That’s called compassion—something seemingly lacking in high-profile representation these days. You should bring humanity to your representation. But your job is not to make your clients feel better at all costs. As we’ve discussed, young lawyers in initial consultations typically want two things: to seem smart and “land the client.” Imposter syndrome rages like a torrent beneath the calm surface of feigned confidence, leading to bluster, snap judgments, and—worst of all—overly optimistic guarantees.
Don’t make promises you can’t keep. In fact, let’s just keep it simple.
DON’T GIVE GUARANTEES.
It’s time for a shock. Brace yourself—here it comes. Sometimes, clients lie. (*pause for effect*).
Yes, I know . . . if you’ve been a lawyer for more than a hot minute, this comes as no surprise. But remember, clients don’t just lie to their spouses, the police, the IRS, or on the witness stand. Sometimes, they even lie to their own lawyers. Think about it. If things were as clear as they make it seem, no one would need lawyers! This doesn’t mean they are bad people. Even an honest person may hide embarrassing evidence from their attorney out of fear that the lawyer would refuse to represent them if they knew.
Instead, the truth tends to coalesce over time as trust grows, shame fades, memories are jogged, evidence is reviewed, or—worst of all—during cross-examination. You rarely get the whole story up front. So, assuring a particular outcome early in the case based on incomplete information is risky, if not foolhardy, and is potentially disastrous.
Follow a simple rule: Stay in your lane. You aren’t hired to say “yes” or to placate or validate clients’ bad behavior. You aren’t the voice of moral authority and can’t grant absolution. You aren’t the judge; no matter how prescient you feel, you can’t predict the future. Lawyers often win things they should’ve lost and lose things they should’ve won and have no idea why.
Ironically, the attempt to placate often causes unnecessary conflict, which makes achieving the client’s goals harder. Guarantees make amicable resolution far more difficult, as unrealistic expectations tend to anchor clients’ settlement demands. When not met, guarantees can lead to unpaid legal bills, malpractice suits, and grievances.
I once watched a litigant, upon hearing the judge’s ruling, turn and bellow at his lawyer, “WHAT? You PROMISED we would win! I paid you $125,000! I already bought [the child] a plane ticket, remodeled her room, and enrolled her in school!” It got so heated that the bailiff had to remove him from the courtroom and escort the lawyer to her car. You see, clients won’t care why what you promised didn’t happen—only that it didn’t. And even if it’s their fault, they won’t take the blame.
This doesn’t mean you are powerless to soothe your clients’ fears. Simply promise things within your control. “I’ll work hard.” “I’ll treat your problem like the priority it is.” “You won’t be alone.” “I’ve got your back.” “You needn’t be afraid anymore.” Just be sure to follow through.
The best strategy is to create and manage realistic expectations. Don’t promise, pander, or placate. And remember—never guarantee outcomes. In the long run, your clients—and you—will be much better off.
I guarantee it.
