The test isn’t just a measure of legal knowledge. It’s a test of endurance, mindset, and persistence. It can feel lonely. It can feel overwhelming. And some days, it might feel like you’re the only one struggling.
But you’re not.
Fred Rogers’s quote, spoken by his mother to comfort him during turbulent times, reminds us that even in chaos, even in fear, there are people who show up to help. That message, gentle and profound, holds true in bar prep, too. You don’t have to do this alone. In fact, you shouldn’t.
My colleague, Katie Armstrong, probably stated it best in her upcoming law review article, “Passing the Bar In and Through Community: The Science Behind Why We Truly Do Better Together.”
In her article, Armstrong, the assistant director of bar preparation at the University of Dayton School of Law, wrote that bar prep has long been seen as a solitary endeavor. But that model is outdated and damaging. She said that students and graduates are wired for connection, and community isn’t just a comfort but rather a catalyst for success.
This article is your reminder—and maybe even your permission slip—to seek out help, to lean on others, and to embrace community. The path to bar exam success isn’t meant to be walked in solitude. There are helpers everywhere, and you don’t have to look too hard to find them.
Below are five essential groups of helpers you should seek out during your bar exam journey. Each plays a unique and powerful role in supporting your success as long as you’re willing to reach for them.
1. Family, Friends, and Emotional Anchors
Bar prep doesn’t just test your intellect; it can test your relationships. The long hours, the mood swings, the missed birthdays and family get-togethers—it’s a lot. But this is where your people come in.
Whether it’s a parent who calls every Sunday, a partner who does the grocery shopping so you can keep studying, a best friend who texts, “You’ve got this!” before every practice exam, or a pet that lays at your feet while you outline torts—these people are your emotional foundation.
They may not know the difference between res judicata and res ipsa loquitur, but they know you. They know when you’re withdrawing, when you’re pushing too hard, and when you’re about to hit a wall. They’re not just cheerleaders. They’re often your tether to sanity.
But here’s the key: you have to let them in.
Tell your loved ones what bar prep is really like. Let them know what you need and don’t need, whether that’s check-ins, quiet space, or understanding when you're less present. Helpers want to help, but they need guidance on how.
If someone asks how they can help, don’t say, “I’m fine.” Instead, say, “Could you remind me to take a walk every evening?” or “Can you handle the laundry for the next two months?” Be specific. You don’t have to do everything yourself.
2. Law School Professors and Bar Prep Faculty
After graduation, many students assume their relationship with their law school is over. But professors—especially those like me, who are involved in academic success and bar preparation—are often deeply invested in your next chapter.
These are the people who can help you dissect a Civil Procedure essay or untangle a messy Evidence hypo. But more than that, they’re the people who know the journey. They’ve helped past students through anxiety, failure, triumph, and retakes. They know how to spot the warning signs of burnout. They know how to recalibrate your study plan when it’s not working. They’ve seen the storm, and they can help you navigate it.
Still, some students avoid reaching out. Why? Maybe they’re embarrassed. Perhaps they fear judgment. Or maybe they worry that asking for help makes them look unprepared.
It doesn’t. It makes you smart.
You’re not supposed to know how to do this alone. You’ve never taken the bar exam before. And your professors—especially those running bar support programs—want you to succeed. They wouldn’t be in this work otherwise.
3. Commercial Bar Review Companies
It’s easy to view commercial bar review courses as emotionless, robotic study programs. Yes, they’re structured programs. But they also offer a surprisingly rich ecosystem of support, as long as you engage with it.
Most bar review courses today include more than just videos, outlines, and practice questions. They have diagnostic tools, personalized schedules, progress tracking dashboards, writing feedback, and sometimes even one-on-one coaching. Some even offer wellness webinars, online communities, and mentorship programs.
The biggest mistake bar examinees make with these programs: Not taking advantage of all the features and opportunities that courses offer.
Bar review companies are helpers, too—but only if you use them. So, reach out when you hit a wall. Email your bar coach if you’re falling behind. Submit those essays for feedback and then make improvements based on those suggestions. Bar review companies are staffed with people whose job it is to get you across the finish line.
4. Mental Health and Counseling Services
Bar prep takes a toll. For many students, it brings out latent anxiety, amplifies perfectionism, or triggers burnout. And for some, it can lead to depression, panic attacks, or serious mental health struggles.
Too many students treat these symptoms like homework: I just need to push through. But you can’t case brief your way out of anxiety. You can’t outline your way out of a depressive episode.
Mental health support isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. And help is available. Many law schools, like the University of Dayton School of Law, offer free or subsidized counseling for graduates preparing for the bar exam. Local therapists often have experience with high-stress professions. Teletherapy platforms make support accessible from anywhere.
Another valuable and often overlooked resource is your state’s Lawyer Assistance Program (LAP). LAPs exist in most jurisdictions and are designed specifically to support the mental health and wellness of law students, bar applicants, and practicing attorneys. These programs offer confidential services that may include counseling referrals, support groups, wellness coaching, substance use recovery resources, and advice on how to navigate stress and anxiety related to the bar application process. Best of all: These services are often free or low-cost, and usually completely confidential, meaning they’re not reported to the bar admission authorities.
And let’s be clear: you don’t need a clinical diagnosis to benefit from therapy. A few sessions with a counselor can help you manage stress, build resilience, and learn to regulate the emotional rollercoaster of bar prep.
You wouldn’t wait until you break your leg to get medical help. Don’t wait until you’re emotionally wrecked to seek support for your mind. So, make a therapy or counseling appointment before the panic sets in. Think of it like mental maintenance. You’ll be glad you did.
5. Your Fellow Bar Examinees
There’s something uniquely comforting about connecting with others who are going through the exact same thing. Your fellow bar takers may not be experts, but they are experts in this moment. They know what it’s like to feel overwhelmed by a 100-question multiple-choice question set. They understand the specific dread of realizing you forgot an entire rule in your essay.
Your colleagues and former classmates can be study partners, venting buddies, co-coaches, and co-survivors. They can make group chats that feel like lifelines. They can turn practice sessions into mini-morale boosters. They’re the people you text at 2 a.m. when you can’t remember the Rule Against Perpetuities, and they’ll text back with a meme and a “You’ve got this.”
That said, choose your circle wisely. Surround yourself with people who encourage rather than compete. Avoid doomscrollers and complainers who drain your energy.
Don’t Just Survive but Connect and Thrive
The bar exam may be a solo performance, but it’s a group production. Helpers exist at every stage of this journey, from emotional supporters to academic guides, institutional resources to peer companions. And success doesn’t require martyrdom. It requires resilience, structure, and support.
Fred Rogers didn’t say to be the helper. He said to look for them. He knew that in moments of distress, what we need most isn’t more pressure, but more people.
So, look for the helpers. They’re there. They always are. And they’re ready to help you pass the bar.
