A Time Before Tech: The Importance of Social Connections

There was a time without modern technology as we know it. As a millennial, I was the last generation to grow up before the invention of the Internet. Life was slow-paced back then, but in a good way, although I didn’t realize it until later. I remember begging my parents to let me stay outside a little longer after dinner because I wanted to play, whether it was meeting up with neighborhood friends, playing at the neighborhood park, riding my bicycle, or a combination of all three. The point is that all kids during this time wanted to stay outside of the house. There was a sense of freedom when we were outside of the house—free of the rules of the house set by our parents. Outside was a place for us kids, a place where we felt a sense of privacy. We were free to do what we wanted to do and be whoever we wanted to be. We weren’t constantly taking pictures every second of every day. (I am somewhat guilty of this now.) We weren’t confined to the screens on our smartphones or other tech devices. We just lived in the moment.

The Invention of the Internet: A Brave New World

The wide adoption of the Internet opened a brand-new world for me. Anything was possible (and, really, it still is). It was an exciting time. But the Internet did not dictate every second of every day—at least not yet. The unregulated chatrooms of AOL and the days of AIM instant messenger will forever live as part of my fond childhood memories, but they were only a part of it. I still hung out with my friends at the neighborhood malls, participated in school clubs, activities, and sports, and did things that a normal teenager would do back then in the early 2000s. And then came social media. Social media was a game changer. MySpace, Friendster, Asian Avenue, and Facebook were a few platforms that I became familiar with during my college days. But even then, if you wanted to upload photos to your profile, you had to do it the “old-school” way. If you were cool, you had a digital camera (I had a pink Canon), or you had your Motorola razr flip phone (yes, I had the pink one). Uploading photos took time and effort, so there were times you didn’t upload photos from a party until weeks or months later—we did not want to be confined to our rooms and computers to do it. And photo filters and edits weren’t a thing back then. We just uploaded our photos unfiltered. It was as real as it could get. In a sense, we were still somewhat “free” to live and be ourselves.

The Invention of the Smartphone: Goodbye to Life as We Knew It

A pivotal moment in society was the invention of the smartphone, specifically the Apple iPhone. The iPhone actually was not the first smartphone, although it may seem like it as it’s still very popular to this day. The IBM Simon Personal Communicator was actually the first smartphone, and it was released in 1994. Then, the very popular BlackBerry came along in 1999, created by the Canadian company Research in Motion (RIM). It was one of the first phones to allow mobile web use and email. I know the BlackBerry was a favorite until the iPhone came along in 2007. I personally refused to switch to a smartphone until years later. I absolutely loved my Nokia brick phone. It was reliable, and there was honestly nothing wrong with it. Plus, the cost of a smartphone was a lot back then compared to the competition, and it required customers to sign a contract with a phone carrier. The first-generation iPhone had access to the Internet—it could access email, browse the web, including Google and Yahoo! Search, and it could use maps. It also had a touch screen, a few physical buttons, and Bluetooth connectivity. These specs alone were groundbreaking in the tech world and society in general. Shortly after the release of the iPhone, the first commercial version of an Android smartphone was released in 2008—the HTC Dream, also known as the T-Mobile G1. I ultimately purchased a smartphone, the iPhone 4 to be exact, because of the release of FaceTime, another groundbreaking invention, on that model. We’re now on the iPhone 16 models! The iPhone (and smartphones in general) is one of the greatest inventions of our time, no doubt. Slowly but surely, smartphones completely changed all our lives, for better or for worse.

Pandora’s Box: Where Do We Go Now?

We now live in a world of instant gratification, and we really don’t appreciate the little things. This mentality impacts every part of our lives, including the relationships we maintain (or don’t). It seems like it’s rare to have meaningful relationships of any kind these days. I’ve had this discussion with many of my childhood friends, and we generally are on the same page—as you get older, people disconnect. I reconnected with a lot of friends, old and new, during the pandemic to make sure that they knew I was thinking of them and their loved ones (I’ve maintained those connections). It was an unprecedented, scary time for everyone. And yes, I reached out to these friends with the help of the Internet. The Internet does have positive impacts on our society.

During the pandemic, we were forced to put life on pause in a sense. Certain things were canceled, such as March Madness and other sports. I can still recall terrible things that happened during those years. I personally lost some friends and mentors to COVID. During that pause, I was reminded of some of the most important things in life—our connections. Social connections as human beings can be just as important to physical and mental health as healthy eating and exercise. There are many studies showing that a lack of social connection (i.e., social isolation and loneliness) is linked to a variety of negative health outcomes, from physical conditions such as heart disease and strokes, to psychiatric issues such as anxiety and depression, to cognitive problems such as dementia. While social media aims to help society interact with each other on a larger, international scale (which it does), it does not replace true, physical, meaningful interaction with one another. I’ve heard horror stories from my friends using online dating apps. Again, we live in a world driven by instant gratification, a superficial world where it seems as if physical looks matter more than your personality or intelligence, and people don’t have the patience to nurture relationships (of any type) with one another.

I think we’ve all become very dependent on technology. That’s not always a bad thing, and I don’t think it is going to change, ever. I think we do need to learn to disconnect from certain technological devices, such as our smartphones, for our own good—me included. It’s a constant battle to spend less time on social media and my iPhone in general, given the demands of lawyer life. My iPhone has become very much a part of my lawyer life. But I am slowly learning that it’s okay not to respond to an email at midnight and that I shouldn’t be doomscrolling deep into the night. I’ve also become very aware of my surroundings and how I interact with others, and this is in part because I survived the pandemic. I strive to have meaningful conversations with people and live in the moment. If I instill anything in my readers, I hope it’s this: Please take the opportunity to love yourself and others enough to live in the moment, give each other grace, and nurture those relationships. Meaningful relationships are what truly matter in life. Connect with each other through technology, but make plans to interact with each other in person once in a while, too, if you can. It’s important.