Strategies for Maintaining Well-Being and Managing Stress
Consciously prioritizing our well-being is paramount, especially during the holiday season. Below are a few simple strategies to promote wellness and manage stress this time of year.
Say No
You can’t spell Noel without putting no first! Your time and energy are limited and precious. Only say yes to holiday activities that uplift you and bring you joy. You can’t pour hot cocoa from an empty mug. Put your mental and emotional needs first.
We realize that, as easy as it sounds in theory, it can be extremely difficult in practice to say no. For example, we may feel inherent pressure to accept party invitations in our professional sphere, even if we are already stretched dangerously thin with family commitments. So, how can we overcome potential feelings of guilt when saying no?
On our podcast, The Legal Mindset Corner, we explored managing holiday stress with Danielle Hall, executive director of the Kansas Lawyers Assistance Programs. Danielle unpacked why lawyers may be particularly prone to holiday stress, including our often perfectionist mindset: “Even though attorneys like to think that we’re superheroes at times and we can balance everything going on, we’re human just like everybody else is.”
Before making a commitment, Danielle asks herself: If the project or event were tonight or tomorrow, would I still say yes? To help overcome the guilt that can arise when saying no, Danielle further employs the “Oreo method” when declining an invitation. She recommends sandwiching the “negative” aspect—saying no—between two positives, such as thanking the person for the invitation and asking the inviter to please consider her for future opportunities.
Although challenging, it is possible to conserve energy during the holiday chaos while still managing our professional and social obligations. Cindy was impressed by the deft strategy employed by one of her coaching clients. This attorney instructs his secretary to respectfully decline all holiday party invitations and simultaneously schedule a one-on-one lunch with the inviter in January. We applaud this brilliant means to achieve balanced work-life integration while honoring self-care!
Just Breathe
Developing awareness of our stress triggers and responses is a necessary first step to effective stress management. Indeed, spending time with family can often cause physical and emotional stress and may even activate unresolved past trauma in our bodies and minds. Conversely, many struggle with loneliness during this time of year. Whether you are by yourself or inundated with family members, remember that your breath is always here as a supportive ally!
During challenging moments, take long, slow, deep breaths, focusing on making your exhale longer than your inhale, which is a fast, simple way to immediately induce a sense of calm, relaxation, and mental clarity. Make it a habit to consistently check in with what you are feeling and experiencing. Observe, without judgment, how stress may be manifesting—are you clenching your jaw, tensing your neck and shoulders, or even holding your breath? Consciously and compassionately lend your breath to any areas of tension or stress. For more simple breathwork techniques to get out of “fight or flight” quickly, visit legalburnout.com.
Focus on the Present (Moment)
Often, we can get wrapped up (pun intended) in the gift-giving aspect of the holidays, fixating on curating the “perfect” experience for our loved ones. It can be all to easy to ruminate on the past or speculate about the future, rather than being in the here and now. As the now famous saying goes, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift, which is why we call it the present.”
Accept the present moment for what it is—rather than wishing it to be different. See the beauty when things don’t go exactly according to plan. It’s precisely those moments-–like when the cookies go up in smoke (literally!)—that form our cherished memories and lead to lots of laughter. It can also be helpful to meet the present moment with gratitude, a known means to improve our mental and physical well-being. For further tips to integrate mindfulness into your everyday life and law practice, contact us today at [email protected] for a copy of our Mindfulness Resources Guide for Attorneys.
Moving Forward
By prioritizing mental or physical health every day of the year, any attorney will enjoy positive results such as stronger emotional balance and a better quality of life. Taking care of yourself during the holiday season is especially important in light of the unique stresses we all face during this joyful yet demanding time of the year. We recommend that you carve out time in the midst of the celebratory chaos to consider whether you are experiencing some of the symptoms exhibited by Cheryl and to implement some or all of the suggestions outlined above.
Join us in our next column, where we will focus on how legal professionals can cultivate self-compassion and why it is important.