Tuning Your Language

Vol. 40 No. 8

By

Bryan A. Garner is the president of LawProse, Inc. He is the author of many widely used books, including Making Your Case: The Art of Persuading Judges (with Justice Antonin Scalia) and Garner’s Modern American Usage. He is the editor in chief of all current editions of Black’s Law Dictionary.

Until well into the 20th century, there were traditionally thought to be only three professions: medicine, the ministry, and the law. Strange, isn’t it, to think that teachers, executives, accountants, scientists, and engineers were not considered professionals? That’s the old‑school view: only doctors, the clergy, and lawyers belonged to what were more specifically called the “learned professions.”

In more up-to-date terms, what distinguishes a calling we now consider a profession—please refrain from jokes about the “oldest profession”—is prolonged specialized training in a body of abstract knowledge. Professional training leads to the mastery of a skill involving a strong intellectual component. Today any occupation that involves such training is inarguably considered a profession.

If you aspire to be a lawyer, you’re aspiring to a profession whose sole equipment is language. We speak and write professionally. That’s all. We have no other tools but words.

Which means that if you want to do well as a lawyer, you need to be really good with words. You need an ample vocabulary, and you must know how to use it effectively. A lawyer’s using a wrong word is akin to a musician’s playing a wrong note.

All this might seem obvious—until you realize that most people in your life, people who speak to you all the time, aren’t particularly effective users of language. Let’s face it: we’re surrounded by linguistic slobs. If you’re not highly conscious of language—your own and others’—the prevalent sloppiness and imprecision will affect (not impact) how you speak and write.

“The law,” as Professor William Prosser (of torts fame) once wrote, “is principally a literary profession.” True. And the particular brand of language in America with a significant literary heritage is Standard English, known also as “educated English.” It is the English traditionally used by educated speakers. This is concededly a political matter in part: in every culture, the standard language is the type traditionally used by people in power. Perhaps that’s distasteful in our society, but it’s reality. But at least Standard English is available to everyone who cares to learn it. The commentator Barbara Wallraff noted in 2000: “Deviations from standard English, or what people take to be deviations, are more likely to arouse fury, pity, or scorn than admiration for the deviator’s individuality.”

So what differentiates standard from nonstandard English?

I’ll give you 30 indicators. Some will surprise you. Memorize them all. If you doubt me, look up the point in a respected usage book. See what the authorities say. In the list at left, the asterisk is used (as in standard linguistic practice) to note departures from Standard English.

Why memorize them? So you can start cultivating better habits. That way, you’ll be taken seriously in job interviews. You may get a foot in the door. But if you use the unrefined phrases, you are more likely, in the words of the linguist Graham Wilson, to be considered “vulgar, uneducated, or simply rustic.”

There’s good news, though. Your feelings won’t be hurt. Why? Because no one will tell you. You’ll never know why you weren’t hired.

 

Right: I feel bad.                               Wrong: *I feel badly.

Right: I feel good. (This means
          “I feel contented.”)

Right: I feel well. (This means
          “I feel healthy.”)

Right: Just between you and me.        Wrong: *Just between you
                                                                        and I.

Right: He expected Helen and me       Wrong: *He expected Helen and 
          to help him.                                           I to help him.
                                                                  
Right: I couldn’t care less.                 Wrong: *I could care less.

Right: I’m going to lie down.               Wrong: *I’m going to lay down.

Right: Yesterday I lay out in the         Wrong: *Yesterday I laid out in
          sun.                                                      the sun.     

Right: Many times I have lain             Wrong: *Many times I have laid 
          out in the sun.                                       out in the sun

Right: I played well.                           Wrong: *I played good.

Right: I’m doing well.                         Wrong: *I’m doing good.

Right: Where are you?                       Wrong: *Where are you at?

Right: If I had been there . . . .           Wrong: *If I had have been
                                                                 
      there . . . .

Right: If I had been there . . . .           Wrong: *If I had have been
                                                                       there . . . .

Right: I’m a lawyer; as such,              Wrong: I’ve been hired on the 
          I have fiduciary duties.                          case; *as such, I have
                                                                      fiduciary duties.

Right: The letter was sent by             Wrong: The letter was sent *on 
          accident.                                               accident.

Right: I wish I were smarter.              Wrong: *I wish I was smarter.

Right: Learning grammar is more       Wrong: Learning grammar is 
          fun than learning algebra.                       *funner than learning
                                                                       algebra.

Right: I could have done it.                Wrong: *I could of done it.

Right: in regard to.                            Wrong: *in regards to.

Right: fewer items.                            Wrong: *less items.

Right: two pairs of shoes.                  Wrong: *two pair of shoes.

Right: Anyway, he denied it.              Wrong: *Anyways, he denied it.

Right: He was undoubtedly guilty.      Wrong: He was *undoubtably
                                                                      guilty.

Right: preventive.                              Wrong: *preventative.

Right: There are lots of reasons.        Wrong: *There’s lots of reasons.

Right: as best she can.                      Wrong: *as best as she can.

Right: regardless or irrespective.        Wrong: *irregardless.

Right: smaller number of people.        Wrong: *smaller amount of people.

Right: mischievous.                           Wrong: *mischievious.

 

 

 

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